After the complete isolation in his previous building, the company of other people, even fellow tv-watchers, helped David a little – but it wasn’t enough.  Conversation with other residents was often difficult, and he wished that staff members would talk with him.  One part-time staff member who loved gardening discovered that David shared that love, and she looked for opportunities to sit with him and compare notes on the struggles and victories of gardening in Zone 3.  David looked forward to her shifts and reported these conversations in detail.

Whether other residents had “essential caregivers” who could enter the building wasn’t clear.  I rarely saw anyone who might be a friend or family member, and it seemed to me that the noses of some staff members were out of joint because I was allowed in – but I may have misread their tone and behavior.  Given the COVID situation in the summer of 2020, the staff was almost certainly overworked, underpaid, and at serious risk.  They may have seen me as a COVID threat.  Bearing all that in mind, I tried to figure out how hard I should push for resuming activities.  If that wasn’t possible, couldn’t the staff encourage  distancing between residents in the common areas?  How could I help to keep fellow residents from walking out of David’s room with his pants?  What was the best strategy for responding to the staff member who took away some of David’s belongings and put them in a locked closet because she felt his room was too crowded?  How should I approach the administrative staff when David reported that he hadn’t had breakfast or hadn’t had his meds?  The nurse was excellent and entirely willing to explain the system for administering and tracking meds.  Other administrators were defensive and brusque.  Where was the line between effective advocate and meddlesome, difficult family member?